Dead Horse Ranch Camping Weekend

I hope and pray that everyone had a Merry Christmas yesterday.  We had just the right amount of Christmas presents and Christmas surprises.  My parents went for the fun and sentimental by buying a slot car track for us and our kids.

I am getting "caught up" with the blogs that I have been wanting to write but limited by time.  I started this sometime in May but didn't get very far.  The pictures were taken with Eric's Nikon and I think that he is also the principle photographer.

We spent Memorial Day weekend of 2013 camping two hours north of the Phoenix-metro area at a state park called Dead Horse Ranch, which is located near the Verde River.  It is a great location to camp for an extra long weekend because it is within 30 minutes of Sedona and even closer to Jerome and Tuzigoot National Monument.

View from our campsite the first night at Dead Horse Ranch State Park.
It reminds me of that scene from Star Wars of Luke at dusk with the setting suns.

Background:  Dead Horse Ranch State Park got its name because a Minnesota family looking to buy a ranch in Arizona decided to buy the ranch that had a dead horse on its property.  They named their ranch "Dead Horse Ranch."  When they decided to sell it to the state, they made the state keep the name.  Most people think of sand, cactus and canyons when they think of Arizona, but this location, like Woods Canyon Lake and other camping areas near a river, this place is GREEN.  It has big Cottonwood trees, tall grasses around the dammed ponds, and I even heard and saw red-winged blackbirds, which is one of the birds I REALLY miss from my days in Lake County, Illinois.  And all this green is surrounded by the red rock cliffs and high desert.

This looks more like a photograph taken in
Lake County, Illinois or Minnesota
rather than Arizona.

However, expanding the scope of the picture adds
elements that you won't find in either IL or MN--cliffs

To do in Dead Horse Ranch State Park:
First of all, Memorial Day weekend was pretty hot.  This is a better place to camp at during the early spring/late fall.
*  Fishing:  There are three stocked ponds and the Verde River.  The problem with camping on Memorial Day is that it is right before they re-stock the lakes, which means that only the REALLY smart fish are there, if any.  We didn't catch anything. If fishing is your focus, check with the park to see when the best times to fish are.
*  Hiking:  There are several trails to hike around the park.  The hike we liked the most took us near the river, where the kids and I took off our shoes and walked around in places up to our knees.  Eric fished without success in a different part of the river.
*  State Junior Ranger Badge activity worksheet:  For those campers who have kids, a lot of state parks and most national parks have Junior Ranger programs where kids complete activity sheets based on the park's features in exchange for a button.
*  Facilities:  Dead Horse Ranch State Park has four camping areas.  We stayed at the Raven loop, which was set up just for tents.  It is the highest camping area in the park, which is NOT ideal for tents.  There were few, short trees around the area and therefore very little respite from the sun unless you have a sunshade, like we do.  Furthermore, while we were there, every afternoon the wind whipped up, blowing up sand.  Therefore, lounging around the tent was NOT an option in this area.  The most ideal place to camp is the Quail Loop, even though it is set up for RV campers, because it is near enough to the river that there are tall trees and grass in the tent areas, which makes the area cooler.  Note:  I have nothing against RV campers other than RVs with air conditioners make a lot of noise and create light pollution that obliterates the stars. There might be some envy, too regarding the sleeping arrangements.  All of the camping areas have free showers, which I REALLY prefer to have when camping.

Wading in the Verde River on a hot day

Because our family is not a fishing family in general and our kids tolerate only so much hiking, we took the opportunity to drive to Jerome and Tuzigoot in one day.  Jerome is a former mining ghost town and current tourist trap, a la Galena to Illinois natives, about 20 minutes of twisty roads from Dead Horse Ranch.  There is a place where you can go to look down one of the mine shafts and a state park which details the town's history.  The town is built on the sides of the mountain, so driving involves twisty roads, also similar to Galena.  We didn't really tour the whole town, so I can't give a review of it.  The state park is nice and gives kids a chance to earn a Junior Ranger badge.  We had our dog with us, so I stayed out with the dog while Eric toured with the kids and then they hung around the outside while I toured the inside.  I didn't spend a lot of time in the museum and have forgotten most of the information.  But I DID spend a lot of time looking at the surrounding area.  You can see the red and white cliffs of Sedona from Jerome.  We could have spent 1/2 a day there touring the rest of the town, but we wanted to see Tuzigoot National Monument.

A view of the closed mine that started Jerome from the State Park parking lot

A view of the red and white rocks of Sedona from Jerome

Tuzigoot National Monument is an the remains of  an old pueblo built by the Sinagua people that sits atop a hill.  What makes Tuzigoot wonderful is that you can tour the remains and actually go inside the biggest building and tour around the surrounding buildings.  There is also a wonderful view of a marsh--yes, that's right, there is a MARSH in Arizona!  The kids picked up their second Junior Ranger badges of the day, this time from the federal government.  Tuzigoot is 10 minutes from the campground.

The main building atop the hill surrounded by
the ruins of support buildings

The kids and I with the main building off to the left.
My youngest is not in the picture, but Jacques is near my feet.

The marsh near Tuzigoot from the hill.  Green surrounded by brown
is common in desert river valleys.

The day we returned home, we took the long way and visited Montezuma Castle., which is roughly 30 minutes away and not too far off of Highway 17, which brings you back into the Valley of the Sun.  It is another National Monument involving Native American ruins.  This is a spectacularly well-preserved pueblo of the cliff-dwelling Sinagua people.  One reason that it is so well preserved is that they do not let people climb in and look at the building.  Because it is built on a cliff, you only get a far-away look. However, the park museum has a video tour of the inside of the house.  It is also located off the Verde River, so the area is surrounded by lovely, tall trees.  It is hard to capture Montezuma's castle's size in photographs because it is so high and so far away from the path.  The picture did I choose was because it does show relative size.  The interesting thing is that if you look closely at the picture, you will see black spots, which are more holes carved out of the cliff.  I can't remember if these were store rooms or more rooms for families or a combination.  Regardless, the ingenuity of these people who made Tuzigoot and Montezuma's castle without the wheel or iron tools is quite impressive.

Eric and I trying to give perspective.

All in all, Dead Horse Ranch, because it is close to so many other places, would be a great place to hang out for a week.  Below are some distances to some other fun places to visit:
Sedona:  30 minutes away.  It has shops and lots of great trails with fabulous views.  Some of the trails have pueblo ruins.  There is a lot of New Age stuff there as well as countless ways to separate you from your money, just like Galena, Illinois.
Slide Rock State Park:  40 minutes away
Oak Creek Canyon:  about 60 minutes away, which is a great day hike.
Lowell Observatory:  about 1 hour.  They give a great tour and, last time we were there, they gave you an opportunity to vote on the Pluto decision.
Wupataki National Monument (more Pueblo Dwellings):  1 hr, 15 min.
Sunset Crater Volcano National Park:  1.5 hours
Note:  Lowell Observatory, Wupataki National Monument and Sunset Crater Volcano National Park are all very near Flagstaff.  You could probably do two of the three in a day and have dinner in Flagstaff for a break from camp grub.

Christmas Joy

That has been the title of the Winter recital program for Experience Arts School, which has a goal of training future dancers, singers, musicians and thespians to give God glory in their performance.  My girls take aerials there, which is dancing on a long silk fabric that you might see in the circus.  They love doing it and I see it as a way to make them strong physically and bringing beauty and daring into their lives.  One daughter has been disappointed to learn that she would not graduate to the next level as she had hoped to do in the Spring session.  After giving her some comfort, I tried to put it in perspective for her.  I asked her if she enjoyed it and she said that she did.  I asked her if she would enjoy it any less if she had to stay an extra semester at her current level and she said "no."  Then I asked her if she would rather get stronger and better prepared for the next level or flounder by being promoted too soon.  She didn't like the line of questioning at first, but later, admitted that she still enjoyed being in aerials.  And I saw joy in her performance the next day

This year, my goal was to focus on joy.  I haven't been very consistent.  This summer, I was missing my friend and her family, my kids were missing their friends and asking God why He would remove the one homeschool friend that I was content to have.  I started to take my toys and go home.  And then I was miserable because, truly, God is the best friend I could ever have.   He has given me a husband who is my earthly best friend.  He has given me four perfectly wonderful kids who bring me joy in so many unexpected and unconventional ways.  And He is my best friend ever.  He has given me a long distance family that is wonderful, including all the in-laws.  He gave me Jesus, His only Son. Am I being greedy for wanting  demanding more?  I let go and waited and tried to focus on having joy in what God gave me.  In the late summer and fall, I started seeing God answer my questions and bring new people in my life for His perfect purpose.  Joy is a choice, not a feeling, just like love, just like faith.  I can't say that I will always be happy, but I will try and find joy in God, even in unhappy situations.

Joy in running is falling short these days.  I am tired.  I haven't quite made it to being able to run a half marathon yet.  I had been trying to keep up with the "experienced runners running their first marathon", but in truth, I am not experienced.  My left hip started hurting.  I tried to make some changes.  Now my left hip, left foot and right knee hurts when I run distances.  I went to get a short PT evaluation and have exercises to do.  I am going to take a short break while I do the exercises every day and join the "couch potato to marathon runners" because I am a couch potato at heart.  I will continue to train because the Bible says that perseverance builds character and because the long runs are a time when the Holy Spirit speaks to me about my kids, my life and my walk with Him and how He is using this training for training in godliness.  And that is where my joy in running is found.

My preparations for Christmas are noticeably lacking this year except for trying to focus on Jesus.  We have the tree up and decorations out.  I haven't stepped foot in any store since before we left for Thanksgiving. We haven't watched a single Christmas movie or TV show.  Christmas cookies are non-existent.   But I am hoping to have friends over to help me make cookies and take some of them home with them.  And this is the Advent, or season of waiting, so most of my preparations might take place the last week of Christmas.  And God is blessing this Christmas season without any of my "preparation."

May God bless you and your family this Christmas season with His presence and fill you with His joy.

Love,
Tandemingtroll and family (who was photobombed by a precious and very cute nephew in their Thanskgiving family portrait)

Hello Stranger, Nice to Run into You Again

I know, it has been a LONG time since I have written anything.  I have had lots of post ideas floating in my head, but have lacked the energy, will and desire to follow through with my ideas.  Honestly, this summer in Arizona has been the most humid, which means it has also been the most miserable.  I definitely prefer "pizza oven hot" to "extreme sauna hot".  And with children involved in this, that or the other, our only ventures out of the fiery sauna furnace were a couple of camping weekends, which will be the subject of future postings.

In the spring, just after the Boston Marathon bombing, my husband decided to start running to see if he could run distances.  Like all new ventures, he researched different training plans for newbies.  He made it to running a full mile in time for summer and we spent the summer running at 5 in the morning together.  It was both a joy and a series of marriage building moments, especially as we starting adding mileage to our runs.  In general, though, I really enjoyed running with him because he knows how to encourage me and add goofball moments to our run time.  We ran in a 5K together in July in Phoenix called "The Splash Mob 5K" which raised money for a school teaching homeless children. We were supposed to get really wet all through the run, but they had problems with water delivery.  It was not pleasant.  I will never run in the Valley of the Sun in the summer again.  Then we signed up to run in the Maggie's Place 9K, raising money for an organization that provides group housing and training for young pregnant women who are in bad situations.  I ran the 10K last year and we had both signed up for the 10K this year.  Unfortunately, bursitis interrupted Eric's training and he was unable to participate.  If you live in Arizona and like to run, Maggie's Place is a well organized race with really great folks cheering you for you as you run.  Eric is now back to running and we will be running in the Turkey Trot in Minneapolis as we visit family, most of whom have just completed the Minneapolis Marathon.

And now, with the encouragement of my husband, I have signed up for the Phoenix Marathon in March.  I have also joined a training program run by coaches that are affiliated with the Marathon for camaraderie and an a running plan/pace plan.  I am running Mondays, Tuesdays and Thursdays, with my long runs on Saturdays.  Last Saturday, I ran 7 miles for the first time in my life and didn't die.  Of course, in a couple of months, this will seem like a quick run, just like, 15 years ago, a 30 mile bike ride was a short ride for Eric and I. I will be running somewhere around 70 times before I run the actual marathon.  My trainers so far have only given me weekly training plans, so I don't know how many miles I will run before race day.  So far, I have run more than 20 miles on six separate runs.  On Tuesday, the group had us run a mile as fast as we could.  My time was 9:17 minutes, which was about a minute faster than I thought I could run.

Now, if you have seen a pattern on races in which I have participated, you will see that I usually run for a cause.  I had thought about running in the P.F. Chang marathon, and running for Team Charity Grace, who is a little girl adopted several years ago by a homeschooling family and has been diagnosed with mitochondrial disease.  The price tag, however, is excessively steep and I didn't think I could get ready in time to run a full marathon.  So I decided on the Phoenix Marathon and gave money to Team Charity Grace.  However, I don't want this marathon to be just what I can accomplish in 4-5 hours of my life.  I want my run to mean something.  So I am asking my friends and family and the strangers who read my blog to help me help others.  I have a cause that I would like to support during my training program, a cause to encourage me to lose that last 20 pounds and a cause that I would like to support for the actual marathon.

The first cause to encourage me in my training program came to my attention quite a while ago.  I was reading "The Church of No People" blog and one person kept making funny but spot-on comments and his electronic moniker was "The Barba" which is Spanish for beard.  I started reading his blog posts at "Rambling with the Barba", which is also incredibly funny and great encouragement to my walk as a Christian.  He and his family are Christian missionaries living in Paraguay reaching out to young men and women there to help them in practical ways as well as lead them to Christ.  They recently moved to Encarnacion, Paraguay, which is right across the river from Argentina and a relative hop, skip and jump from Brazil.  They are embarking on creating a youth center called "The Bridge" and need help funding it.  I like bridges because my last name in Dutch can be translated as either "bridgetender" or "troll" (hence my electronic moniker).  I chose the "bridgetender" translation for my homeschool name, hopefully for obvious reasons.  To donate to their cause, go here.

The second cause you can choose to donate is the American Cancer Society because there are so many people I know who have battled cancer or who are currently battling cancer.   Cancer sucks and the treatment isn't much better.  To donate to this cause, go here.

The third cause I would like to benefit is my church's program to help the immigrant community by providing ESL classes, tutoring for elementary and middle school children, computer classes, parenting classes and Bible studies for Spanish-speaking immigrants.  Once they get a fundraising link, I will publish the link.

I will spend the next week or so figuring out how to put the fundraising widgets on my page as well as a widget to track my miles for training so that I can write about our camping experiences.  Life is busy, so I probably will only publish once a week.  Thank you for your support

Partially Untethered

Our kids think they are devious.  And they ARE definitely smart about some things.  However, they are currently in a "no electronics" mode of their own making.  Some child took our iPad last week and hid it in the not-usual place.  The usual place is under the cushions in the family room sofa.  My husband and I have the "Find My Phone" app that allows us to see where our Apple products are located as long as they are turned on and force it it make noise until it is found.  We got the app because I frequently misplace my phone but it works for any Apple product.  We sounded the alarm through "Find My Phone" and heard.....nothing.  The clever child had turned off the iPad so that the app couldn't locate it.  However, what they didn't know is that the application continues sending out a signal so that, when the device is turned on it will eventually make noise AND it will record the time at which it last found the device.  So we went to bed knowing that the iPad would eventually make a sound.  What we didn't plan for is that we would sleep through the event.  So the unknown child quickly turned off the sound at 9:34 pm (according to the app) and at some point, crept downstairs and put it in the usual hiding spot, where my husband found it the next day.  All while my husband and I slept soundly.  So far, kids 2, parents, 1/2.

However, that little trick has caused us parents to reconsider our electronics habits for the kids and has caused this mom to reconsider her use of electronic devices, since our kids are so good at copying us.  So, until the guilty party/parties confesses their "crime", all electronic devices are confiscated and held for ransom in the parent's room and all electronic activities are terminated.  One child started to "investigate" who committed this dastardly deed until I explained to her that, since she was a suspect, her investigation constituted a conflict of interest, which, because she is argumentative, started a whole legal discussion.  The culprit has yet to confess, though it really is only a matter of time before they crack.  We went camping this weekend, which is usually an electronic free zone (if you don't count posting pictures on Facebook as electronic time) and they don't miss that time as much.  But school is almost out and summer is coming, which in this part of the country means that you stay indoors after 9am unless it involves swimming.  Eventually, they will either learn to live without electronics or, driven mad by their electronic-less lifestyle, they will crack.  Bwahahahaha!

For my part, I decided to take Facebook and Pinterest off of my phone so that I have one less distraction from my surroundings.  While we were camping, I used my phone to make a few texts, check email and to write down some of our camping experiences, but that was it.  And let me tell you, it showed me just how Facebook has become an unhealthy habit. Several times over the three days, I went to my phone to check up on Facebook and realized that I couldn't.  Facebook must have missed me, too, because after two days of inactivity, it sent me an email telling me of all the things I was missing (9 notifications and several big stories among my friends!).  Thanks, Facebook...NOT!  And then I started wondering if Facebook missed me more than my kids.  What a sobering thought, even if it probably isn't true.  So even though I missed Facebook on my phone because of the habits I have developed, I can say that I didn't miss the time I was able to spend with my kids watching them play at the campsite and all the reading I was able to do.  It is one small step for momma which hopefully will lead to one giant step for family time.

Parenting: The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly

Parenting is REALLY tough.  In the almost 14 years that I have been a parent, I have experienced and demonstrated the good, the bad, and the ugly in parenting.  My brother and sister (in-law) just embarked on that lifetime job when they gave birth to my beautiful, precious niece two months ago.  I had the joy and privilege to spend alone time with my family, including her for part of this week.   And I will be praying for them to have God's strength in the good, bad and ugly times of parenting.

This week, I listened to Paul Tripp talk about anger and the heart issues behind it.  And, as usually happens when I hear God's word applied in my life, I felt totally convicted.  I repented of all the idols in my life that lead to my outbursts of anger at my kids, at my husband and, even at God.  And there was a certain amount of pride that I had to release, too.  But the change I want to happen won't happen without His Spirit giving me His character and undergoing deep-seated, 40+ year-deep habits doesn't happen overnight or with any consistent progress.  And one day this week with my kids proves it:

Morning:  A child is being disrespectful.  When I quietly ask the child if the tone and wording is respectful, the child sulks and gets more disrespectful.  After four more instances in ten minutes, as I feel God's patience welling up in me and His concern for the child's heart issues behind the attitude, I suggest that the child take a few minutes and give God everything that is causing the poor tone and attitude so that He can help change it.  By the end of the lesson, that child's attitude is changed and we have a great day together.  Score!  In this split second, I am an awesome parent.

Afternoon:  We are preparing for a camping excursion, a karate class and our weekly Bible study fellowship simultaneously.  Too many things to do.  My temper is short as we race around to pull everything together.  I pack meals for everyone to eat on the car ride or during karate class (for those participants)  and some snacks for the fellowship.  I pack a cold case with some hummus that should be eating soon, along with eating utensils for the night.  The same Child-With-An-Attitude goes to the car to retrieve the utensils before karate starts.  After the class is over, I go to the back and find the hummus has been sitting out of its cool case for ninety minutes in a 100+ degree car.  I let out a wail and say, "Why can't you kids EVER put ANYTHING away?"  before I catch myself and realize that this is a teeny-tiny issue that affects my pride more than anything else.  Fail!  At this moment, I am a bad parent, though I did manage to get a grip before it became ugly.

The child starts feeling bad and God reminds me what I must do to make it right.  I take a moment to apologize and remind her that it REALLY is a no big deal and that I over-reacted to it.  Both of us calm down quickly and have a great car ride.  Save!  I am a redeemed parent.

And that is a wonderful picture of how God's grace works to help us love His way and redeem a situation when we "love" our way.  This song by the late Rich Mullins is my all time favorite because it perfectly describes the typical Christian walk and helps me to remember that God's grace is available to me in any and every situation.  May you experience His grace as you listen to it.

Saying Goodbye to Nana

My mom visited us from Memphis last week.  She wanted to surprise her brother for his 60th, birthday party.  The day she traveled to see us, he called me and tried to call her to tell her that their mother, my Nana, was starting her final descent into what I hoped would be her new life.

We decided to make the trek to Tuscon to see her sooner rather than later, with all my kids in tow so that they could see her for the last time.  It ended up being a beautiful visit.  She recognized my mom and sang to her.  I didn't get to witness much of her visit because one of the kids had to use the facilities, which are at the entrance for visitors.  My mom said that the "J" kids were wonderful with her, holding her hand and telling her they loved her with little encouragement.  Before she left, my mom told Nana how much she loved her and that she was the best mom any child could hope to have.  Nana replied in something that sounded like "I love you, too."  Considering her speech center had been decimated for at least a year, this was a HUGE blessing to both of us.  After all my kids said their good-byes, my mom took them out and Nana and I had alone time.

First of all, I am completely sure that she recognized me for the first time in a LONG time.  I started out telling Nana how much I loved her and she sang back her reply, which wasn't as clear as what she had said to mom.  I asked her if she believed that Jesus died for her sins so that she was right with God.  She nodded her head (blessing upon blessing!).  Then I told her to follow God where He led her next because it was going to be a really good place.  I told her that we would miss her, but in a very short time, we would be joining her.  I then told her that in this new place, she would be given a new body and new clothes and all the things she had lost would be returned to her so that she could do the things that she used to do.  I spent some time remembering all the things that she and I used to do when I was a little girl.  As I recounted all the things we did, I saw a look of clarity and joy in her eyes as she remembered with me (How He loves us, Oh how He loves us!).  All the while, she would reply in songs that I couldn't quite understand.  I prayed for her and told her that I loved her one last time before letting go of her hand.  It was so hard to say good-bye.

Two days later, my uncle called to tell me that she had died.  I am so glad that God blessed that last visit with clarity for her and closure for all of us.

Nana died at the age of 89.  She survived all of her friends, both siblings, one sister who died as a child and a brother who died flying one of his last missions in WWII, as well as two grandsons and two great-grandbabies. She raised three kids largely on her own, even though she was married, because of severe character defects in her husband.  She owned her own home decorating business called "The Inside Shop" in Green Valley for several years.  In her sixties, she took care of her mother, who had senile dementia for many years, delivering papers in the early morning to make extra money while her mom slept so she could be with her during the day when her mom needed more supervision.  She developed a wicked throw, too.   She is survived by two sons and a daughter, three grand-daughters and a grandson, fourteen(?) great-grandchildren and one great-great grandchild.  Below are pictures, with thanks to my Uncle Jeff, who has kept them and scanned many of them over the last few years.

Nana as a toddler on the left, with her mother, brother, and grandmother

Nana's high school graduation picture

Nana with her three children.  

Nana with her dad at his 50th Wedding Anniversary

I look forward to seeing her in her new body when I join her in heaven, where there will be no more "good-byes".

Bringing back the Tribute Series

A long, long time ago, when I was still living in Chicago and had a lot more grandmas who were living, I decided to dedicate some of my blog to giving tribute to those I love before they die, so that they knew exactly how I felt about them before their funeral.  I focused on my parents, step parents and grandparents and eventually my husband (though I am pretty sure he knows how I feel about him).  Today, I want to celebrate my uncle's 60th birthday by giving him a tribute.

Uncle Jeff has a special place in my heart.  He is the sweetest guy I first knew, besides my Bobba Bab (great-grandpa).  When my mom got a divorce, he was in high school.  She started working and going to school part time.  If she couldn't pick me up at day care, he would, and always greet me with his big, wide grin.  I love that grin!

When my mom remarried and they were both working, I spent a lot of summers in Green Valley with Nana, Gigi and Boppa Bab and, of course, Uncle Jeff.  He would take a day off of work to hang out with me and he was the one who taught me how to swim.  He survived divorce and was hopeful enough and loving enough to have a second successful marriage.  He started his own business with his first wife and managed to keep it afloat through the divorce and other challenges for decades.  He helped Nana run a home decorating business when I was a young girl until she sold the business, which is when he started his own.  When Nana wasn't able to work any other jobs, he hired her as part of his business to work part time as a home decoration consultant.  For the last fifteen years, he has been the one to take care of Nana and make the arrangements for her to go into an assisted living facility and later to a nursing home.  He more than anyone else, saw Nana's decline due to Alzheimer's because he visited her so faithfully.  He has shown and continues to show, so much love and devotion for his family and friends.  He is Jesus's love in action.

Happy Birthday, Uncle Jeff!  I love you!